Yes, the title says it all. I love swimming. I’m still not happy in a bathing suit, but there’s something about the water that takes even that care away.

Growing up, swimming was one of my favorite things to do…that is, until I got to be a teenager and worried about what people would say about me in a bathing suit. It’s a shame that I let that get in the way of my joy. These days, after 3 children, I don’t care so much anymore.

I rediscovered swimming a couple of years ago. A messy custody battle, stress at work, a lot of pent up anger all combined to make a very unhappy Carrie. This is also the time I got put on blood pressure medications as well. I decided at that point that I would try to relax a little bit. So, I went back to swimming. I can still remember sneaking out to the pool in the early morning in hopes that no one else would be there. I remember being absolutely mortified when someone would show up and I was ready to get out of the pool. Talk about the walk of shame! Eventually, I got to the point where I would swim laps and then I’d be so exhausted that I’d sit down on one of the lounge chairs just to rest for a moment before heading back to the house. The sun would feel so good and relaxing, I began to forget everyone was around and started to lay out a little bit. By the end of the summer, I was dropping weight like you wouldn’t believe, felt more relaxed, and certainly didn’t give a damn what anyone thought of me. In fact, I became such a regular at the pool, I found many people to talk to.

Then fall came…and the weight came back because I wasn’t exercising or eating correctly. When the next summer rolled around, I just wasn’t ready to go back through all of the shame and embarrassment that putting on a swimsuit entailed. More pounds added on…

Today, I’m feeling better after my Lap Band surgery. I’m down 35 lbs and putting myself first again. I recently started swimming again. I still don’t like the way I look in the bathing suit, but it is what it is…and I’m changing. I know I won’t always look like this; so, why not do some physical activity that I enjoy?

I find the water soothing. When I slip into the pool, I can literally feel my tension leaving my body. There’s also the rush of pleasure when I think that I can’t push my burning muscles and lungs anymore while swimming laps and then discover that I can go just a little bit further. The quiet solitude of swimming underwater and the massaging ripples against me. There’s no better exercise for me.